Whammy, Whammy, Whose Got the Whammy?
By Knightie Katrinka
Time: After Knightie War Council
Knighies used with Permission

"Nick, can I talk for a moment?" Knightie Tracey asked.

"What's up?" Natbody took a cookie out of the cookie jar and began to eat
it. "These are good. Who made them."

"You did-I mean Dr. Lambert made them." The Knightie corrected.

"So what do you need?" Natbody asked between bites.

"It's Katrinka. She's acting oddly."

"Katrinka always acts strange. It's part of her nature." Nick tried to
smile. "You just have to learn to live with her."

"Well, she's stranger then normal." She tried to explain. "She has these
funny turns. Last night she thought she was Katrinka of the Resistance, she
even wore a black beret."

That made Natbody laugh. "You mean she thinks she's part of the French
resistance? World War two ended several years ago."

"Tell me about it." Tracey sighed. "She also thinks she's someone named
Ms'Kaye. She tries to write us up!"

"You are kidding me, aren't you?"

Just then Gemsong yelled from the living room. "Turn it off!"

Natbody rushed into the living area, quickly followed by Tracey. She could
see several Knighties wrestling with Katrinka for the TV remote.

"You're not going to make me Miss Tribal!" Katrinka ran to the TV, and
turned it back on.

"What's Tribal?" Natbody asked.

"It's a sci-fi soap made in New Zealand." Tracey tried to explain. "I
didn't even know it was shown over here."

"Your not allowed to watch TV!" Gemsong reminded her.

"It's a free country!" Katrinka stamped to the couch, and sat down. "I
don't see how a *soap* can be bad."

"She's right," Natbody told the group. "Let her watch her soap."

"Have you lost your mind?" Gemsong asked.

"I want to see what the TV does to her." Natbody sat down on the couch
beside Katrinka.

The group watched the program for a few minutes. Natbody glanced at Tracey.
"How can anyone watch a show where the lead character angst's so much? He
blames himself for everything!"

Tracey did not tell Natbody what she was thinking, which was. *Us Knighties
do it all the time. *

Just then one of the characters dumped a box of watches on a table and
said, "Look, I even found a pocket watch."

Katrinka stared at the watch, then she got up. "Why am I watching this
drivel?"

"Because you like it?" Gemsong asked.

"I haven't heard from Spike in ages." She said impatiently. "I must check
in with my militia."

"Whose Spike?"

Before she could answer, Katrinka had gone upstairs and into the bathroom.

"She's off again." Tracey sighed.

**************

Thirty minutes later Katrinka came out of the bathroom. She had braided her
hair into an elaborate hairdo. Her make up was odd to put it nicely. War
paint was a good explanation of it. She gave Min, who was acting as lookout
a withering look. "What are you doing here? Spying on me?"

"I'm not spying."

"You look like a good kid. If I can ever find Spike, you can join us."

"Whose Spike."

"My flunky-I mean my right hand man." Katrinka plastered on a strange
smile. "I know you mallknights know who Spike is."

"Sure we do," Min said backing away from her leader. She then leaned over
the balcony. "Nick! She's out of the bathroom."

Natbody came out of the bedroom. She looked over the odd Knightie. "It's you."

"Who do you think I am?"

"Nick the head of the Mallknighties." She said as if she was talking to
someone who lost his or her mind. "I'm Kabony, leader of the Militia."

"I think I'm going to be sick." Tracey said from behind Natbody.

"Can you explain who Kabony is?"

"She's a character on a TV show." She explained. "Kat's getting very close
to the no crossover rule!"

"I think she's been whammed, and her mind's trying to rebel against it."
Nick said.

"How can you be so sure?"

Natbody looked ashamed. "Because one time I tried to whammy Schanke and he
thought he was Muldrake."

"Can you help katrinka."

"The names Kabony." The leader corrected.

"Okay, Kabony." The New Zealander was very upset. "Can you help her?"

"I'm not sure if I can whammy someone in this body." Natbody explained.

"It's worth a try! Kabony's the type of character that would sell us out to
the cousins!"

That was enough for Natbody to grab Katrinka by the shoulders. The Knightie
bristled at the touch. Then the vampire looked into her eyes. "Katrinka,
who did this to you?"

"Don't know," Katrinka said, clearly under the spell of Natbody's whammy.

"What can you remember?"

"Shinny things. Must love shinny things." Katrinka said. "Watches are shinny."

"From now on, when you see watches, you won't think of shinny things."
Natbody ordered. "They are dull lifeless. When you see something shinny,
you won't do what ever the vampire told you to do."

"Okay."

Natbody went on, trying to deprogram the Knightie leader. "I think she'll
be okay now."

"Who would want her to like shinny things?" Tracey mused.

"Screed! It must be Screed!" Gemsong guessed. "He gave her the whammy."

"Why would he do that?" Natbody asked.

Just then, Katrinka put a hand to her face. She looked at her fingers with
horror. "Who put make up on me?"

"You did." Tracey said.

Katrinka went into the bathroom, took one look at her, and began to scrub
the war paint off.

Katrinka@flash.net
NICK NEEDS YOU!
Acting Leader of the Knighties